Confucius Quotes Funny: Chuckling with Confucius

Welcome to a lighthearted journey through the wit of ancient Chinese philosopher Confucius. Unveil his unexpectedly humorous side, as we explore Confucius Quotes Funny in this delightful escapade.

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40 Funny Quotes from Confucius

“The person running in front of the chariot gets tired, but the person running behind the car gets tired.”

1. Man who leaves his watch on the toilet has a bad day.

2. A man well-fed on prunes will prosper financially.

3. People who leap off cliffs or have faith leaps take too long to land.

4. A man takes matters into his own hands when he sneezes without using tissue.

5. Never give up on a man who puts his head in the mouth of a lion.

6. A man who tumbles into a molten glass vat makes a show of himself.

   

7. A man who falls asleep in a moving car awakens fatigued.

Confucius Words 

“A man who takes a sleeping pill and a laxative at the same time will wake up in a puddle.”

1. Man heading toward Bangkok who walked sideways through the airport turnstile.

2. Man goes hungry with just one chopstick.

3. A man gets a flat miner for pushing a piano down a mineshaft.

4. The man standing on the toilet is high on marijuana.

5. Crabs are frequently caught by men who fish in other people’s wells.

6. A man who picks up a cat by its tail learns a lesson he will never forget.

7. A man who scratches his buttocks should not bite his fingernails.

Confucius Words

“A man goes to bed with an itchy bum and wakes up with a stinky finger.”

1. A man who sits on tack will inevitably rise.

2. A man who kisses a girl’s behind develops a crack in his face.

3. Man farts in church and sits in his own pew.

4. The man standing on the toilet is high on marijuana.

5. A flat miner is given to a man who pushes a piano down a mineshaft.

6. Man who pulls muscles by playing with himself.

7. Man who run behind car get exhausted.

Funny Quotes from Confucius

“Man who run in front of cars get tired, but man who run behind car get exhausted.”

1. Man who drops watch in toilet, have crappy time.

2. Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. – funny quotes from Confucius

3. Man who fights with wife all day, get no piece at night.

4. Man who marries a beautiful woman, marries trouble.

5. Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding the bag.

6. Man who eats too many prunes, sits on the toilet many moons.

7. Man who sits on tack is sure to rise.

Also Read: Robot Quotes and Captions: Insights from the Future

Funny Quotes from Confucius

“Man who run in front of car get tired, but man who run behind car get exhausted.”

1. Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

2. Man who put head in the lion’s mouth get no second chance.

3. Man who keeps both feet firmly on the ground have trouble putting on pants.

4. Man who run behind the car got exhausted. – funny quotes from Confucius

5. Man who keeps both feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants.

6. Man who pushes the piano down the mineshaft get A flat miner.

7. Man who plays with self, pulls muscles.

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